Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Not-So-Daily Doublesteins

I realize I am posting less frequently than usual. Could be because not much is going on; could be because things are going on but I just don't have the energy to write about them. Lately, I feel like I am at my wit's end by about 11:00 a.m. every single day. No real reason, just some end-of-winter lethargy and the grinding routine of being a mom when my kids are at a stage where someone is always wanting something from me. I fantasize sometimes about the balance my life will find when the girls are in school every day . . . I'll sit down in my living room with a cup of coffee, maybe have some writing to do, pay bills, run errands, figure out dinner, do laundry, talk on the phone uninterrupted, and have literally hours to achieve the things I have to do after 7:00 p.m. right now. But I know that then, I'll probably miss all the wide open time I have with them now, like this morning, when we danced to The White Stripes ("Mom, this music is crazy!") in the living room and Annie helped me make chocolate chip cookies. So I'm trying - trying! - to treasure these days, too, even when my energy is low and my patience is in short supply.

Things that helped today: talking on the phone to Heather about her crazy in-laws (always makes me feel better about my family), books, and the state of the world according to us; getting outside with the girls for a walk around the block with Annie on her beloved scooter; aforementioned cookies plus an unmentionable amount of caffeine; watching the girls play nicely together in the tub; pounding out a little frustration on the treadmill while watching The Daily Show; hitting Target post-gym by myself and finding a few bargains in record time.

A few recent family accomplishments: Jason was listed in West Michigan Family Magazine as one of the top dentists in Grandville (as voted on by peer dentists and area specialists); Annie has learned to write her name and loves to do it on every surface, including, today, the dining room chair; Jemma has added a few words to her repertoire, including "duck," "hot," and "NayNay," her way of saying Annie. This last one is sort of special and bittersweet, because it's what Ben called Annie (and Annie eventually called herself) when they were learning to talk. It's eerie to hear it again, this time from Jemma's little voice, and it makes me realize how quickly the time flies by.

Coming inside just now, it was raining. And even though it was a freezing-cold, driving sort of a rain, it was the first rain in a long time that smelled like rain instead of just being wet snow. Gives me hope that spring really might be just around the corner.

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